Thursday, June 2, 2011
I Don't Want Your Disease You Fabarazeee!
So, I arrived at my new job with a new family on Friday May 6th, And yeah, I know that was almost a month ago, but I've been busy give me a break. I travelled over 1500 miles, and three dayas with Gus to get here, and it was so worth it to be with these kids. They are fun, and undeniably hilarious. Just for introductions sake, Blondie, the oldest is twelve and she's a little shy, but has been slowly coming around. She's quite the helper though. She is gorgeous, seriously. Hammy is ten, and HI-freaking-LARIOUS! He is the main subject of the post but we will get to that. The youngerst is Toothless. She is seven and is also pretty funny. She is the most outgoing and sassy of the group! There is also Cadet. He is eleven, well twelve today I guess. He goes to a military bording school in Kansas, so I am still trying to get to know him better. He is the perfect only child. And then the other kids come home and he becomes my little cupcake baked by the freaking devil!Any ways.. Gus and myself were unpacking my room a couple weeks ago when the short people came in to help. We were rockin out to GaGa's Bad Romance and Hammy was singing along too. After he sang the line, "I want your love, and I want your disease," he stops, looks at me very seriously and says "Oh NO! I don't want your disease!" and then goes back to rockin' out. It was seriously the funniest freaking thing I have ever heard!!!. Also, the next morning the two youngest members of the short people gang were in my room playing with Gus's ipod. Hammy comes in my attached bathroom and says, "Excuse me, but Toothless wont share the ipod, and I'm very upset." HAHA! I had a hard time not laughing because his face was so serious! Toothless also has quite the funny bone. Around the same time as Hammy's lack of disease outburst, the song had changed to Poparatzi, also by the infamous GaGa, Toothless is screaming at the top of her lungs, "Iwwl fowwow you untiw you love me! Faba Faba Fabarazeee!!" Man these kids are too funny! Thank you Blondie, Cadet, Hammy, and Toothless for making my days here full of laughs! You are my favorite short people!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
8:15am
It's 8:15am, and I need an adult beverage. It have just been one of those awful, horribly annoying mornings for the second morning in a row. Yesterday, I took a mental health day and relaxed. I can't take two in a row! That would be madness!! Plus, my mental health is shot, so it would really just be for the sake of everyone else's mental health in having to deal with a raving psycho! And what is this psycho raving about?! A smoke detector you say? Well now, that is strange! REALLY?! REALLY?! Cause I wasn't aware that ranting about a smoke detector is irrational...Huh, I'm gunna have to write that down. So, I resort to needing an adult beverage...oh wait...I can't have one! 1. Because I really don't want one, 2. I can't have one even if I did actually want one because I'm LDS, and like that a whole lot more, and 3. If 1 and 2 weren't in effect, it still wouldn't change the fact that I am not old enough to get one! Well frickity frack!!This is soo not my morning! My smoke alarm is beeping. INCESSANTLY!!! It is driving me mad(er)! It is grating on my already raw nerves that were grated down from yesterday's day from you know where! Bah!! Seriously! Stop beeping! For the love of Maude please stop before I lose my schmidt! Again, I'm aware that this is crazy and I should probably stop. However, telling a raving woman to stop being upset is like telling a pregnant woman that she's fat. You are probably going to get popped in the face. Or the junk.
I'm Just Sayin'
I'm Just Sayin'
Monday, April 18, 2011
Have You Heard the One About Sexual Favors and the Bank Teller?
Alright so, sadly this isn't a joke. Well it is, but not the kind of joke that has a punch line and everyone is like "Bahahahahaha!! That's so funny!" NO. WRONG! Soooo not that kind of joke! Here it goes.
I have these two friends, Emily and Joe, and they have these three awesome kiddos, Jake, Kory, and Rae. Often I watch these kiddos for Emmers and Joseph because I love them, and their kids are super awesome! So one day, Em the Fantastical, gives me a check and giggles as she is writing this....I don't understand. She hands me the check, and I just fold it because I think it is rude to flaunt money in public. Cause what if someone next to you is super poor and you're flaunting money like, "Oh yeah I'm THIS kind of awesome to have all this money! Go me!" Rude right? Right. So, anywho...I look at it later and in the memo line, staring at me like that creeper in the McDonald's drive through window...it clearly says, "for sexual favors." I blushed. Cherry.Red. There I was, the possessor of a check with the words "sexual favors" written on it, signed by the wife of the man whose name is on the check. Wow, that makes me look super scandalous.
I HAD to deposit the check because I had just sent my car payment and I was poorer than dirt. Not even dirt, cause even dirt has nutrients and such.. I was as poor as....sand? Yup sand! I reluctantly drive to the drive through of the bank and avoid eye contact with the teller as I push the check and a deposit slip towards her. She is taking forever, and so I HAVE to look up. There she is...staring at me with wide eyes and a flushed face. I look away, slightly abashed.
I will admit that it was pretty funny, but it's hard to take that to the bank. I REALLY don't want to be arrested for prostitution ya know? That would just throw a huge kink in my life. Not to mention I don't think the Bishop would renew by temple recommend. Just sayin'.
So, to continue with the story. This last weekend I watched Em and Joe's kids again. They were the bomb.com thanks for askin! However, as I was heading out the door, Joe writes me a check and hands it to me with a huge mischievous grin on his face. There, again, on the memo line is "sexual favors." AGAIN. REALLY?? I laughed until I realized that the same teller was at the bank. I chickened out and couldn't go through the line. I have yet to deposit this check because for two weeks in a row I have been compensated by Emily and Joe W. for "sexual favors" aka babysitting. And to top it off, this week was signed by Joe. Awkward. Really really. This is causing a serious spike in my blood pressure.
I'm Just Sayin'
p.s. Em if you are reading this..you are probably laughing your head off because you think you are super funny. You, my dear friend, may be suffering from bungholiosis. Oh yeah. I went there! Also, if I get thrown in jail for prostitution you are SOOO bailing me out!
again,
I'm Just Sayin'
I have these two friends, Emily and Joe, and they have these three awesome kiddos, Jake, Kory, and Rae. Often I watch these kiddos for Emmers and Joseph because I love them, and their kids are super awesome! So one day, Em the Fantastical, gives me a check and giggles as she is writing this....I don't understand. She hands me the check, and I just fold it because I think it is rude to flaunt money in public. Cause what if someone next to you is super poor and you're flaunting money like, "Oh yeah I'm THIS kind of awesome to have all this money! Go me!" Rude right? Right. So, anywho...I look at it later and in the memo line, staring at me like that creeper in the McDonald's drive through window...it clearly says, "for sexual favors." I blushed. Cherry.Red. There I was, the possessor of a check with the words "sexual favors" written on it, signed by the wife of the man whose name is on the check. Wow, that makes me look super scandalous.
I HAD to deposit the check because I had just sent my car payment and I was poorer than dirt. Not even dirt, cause even dirt has nutrients and such.. I was as poor as....sand? Yup sand! I reluctantly drive to the drive through of the bank and avoid eye contact with the teller as I push the check and a deposit slip towards her. She is taking forever, and so I HAVE to look up. There she is...staring at me with wide eyes and a flushed face. I look away, slightly abashed.
I will admit that it was pretty funny, but it's hard to take that to the bank. I REALLY don't want to be arrested for prostitution ya know? That would just throw a huge kink in my life. Not to mention I don't think the Bishop would renew by temple recommend. Just sayin'.
So, to continue with the story. This last weekend I watched Em and Joe's kids again. They were the bomb.com thanks for askin! However, as I was heading out the door, Joe writes me a check and hands it to me with a huge mischievous grin on his face. There, again, on the memo line is "sexual favors." AGAIN. REALLY?? I laughed until I realized that the same teller was at the bank. I chickened out and couldn't go through the line. I have yet to deposit this check because for two weeks in a row I have been compensated by Emily and Joe W. for "sexual favors" aka babysitting. And to top it off, this week was signed by Joe. Awkward. Really really. This is causing a serious spike in my blood pressure.
I'm Just Sayin'
p.s. Em if you are reading this..you are probably laughing your head off because you think you are super funny. You, my dear friend, may be suffering from bungholiosis. Oh yeah. I went there! Also, if I get thrown in jail for prostitution you are SOOO bailing me out!
again,
I'm Just Sayin'
Sunday, April 17, 2011
A Musical Evening
I love musical theatre--thanks Mom--and Sundays are usually my musicals day. Why you ask? Well I'll tell you!! Sundays is "Musical Day" because 99.9% of musicals are completely Sunday appropriate. Also, I have tons of free time on Sunday because:
Cap'n...you must have done something good. |
A. I don't work or do homework on Sundays
and
B. Musicals are super awesome, just like Sundays!
Gene, you can sing for me in the rain whenever you feel so inclined! |
Look at the nerdily handsome and goofy face! How can you resist that?! Achem..the one on the left...incase you were worried about my sanity. |
STORY TIME!
I don't know about you, but story time was always my favorite part of elementary school (the first being nap time...duh). So this one time (not at band camp) I was living with the bestest roommate ever Keishbobeish, and I was waiting for a letter from my missionary. If you know a girl who writes a missionary, letters are serious. If you mess with the letters or anything to do with mail, YOU.WILL.DIE. No joke. So one day I was checking the mail and I was by myself in the mail room. I wasn't expecting a letter cause it was so late I wasn't sure if it was coming at all! But it was THERE! If you can imagine my excitement...then you know what happened next. I busted into dance like Michael Jackson! Whoo!! "The way you make me feeeeeel!!" Achem. Anywho... as it turns out I wasn't alone in the mail room. The girl in there cleared her throat to let me know she was there. I stopped mid moon walk (or what was my attempt at the moon walk.. not pretty) and blushed. She understood me though. She looked at me and said, "Missionary letter?" All I could do was nod, turn around, and walk away. For those two or three moments my life was a musical, and IT.WAS.EPIC!
I'm Just Sayin'
Friday, April 15, 2011
Ready, Set....Go?
I have been packed to go to Texas for a few days now. Alright for a week. Everything other than what I use everyday is ready to go, even the things that I'm not taking. The thing with all this waiting though is that is has given me a lot of time to think about my adventure! LAME. I would rather not think about it until I get there. My best friend is moving to Australia, and I've been occupied trying to get her to not go. But she is more stubborn than I am, and that's saying something! So, she's determined and I don't have anything to occupy the space that is now filled with thinking about leaving my family. HELP! I was doin' pretty good about pushing it out. I rock out to my ipod and whatev. Well yesterday, my ipod turned on me. It's EVIL!
I was walking to the bus stop, listening to my "Happy Go Lucky" playlist, because (obviously) it is filled with happy, rockin, gotta sing along songs. NO! Somehow a slow, sad, and highly annoying (only because it made me do the thing that I didn't want to do...think) song creeps in!! How the frick did you get in there?!?! BAAHH!!! Not only was it annoying because it made me want to kill myself..its a Miley song. And not only was it a Miley song, it was THIS song! RUDE!!!!! I pretty muuch was cryin on the bus....nice. I am officially that creepy, sad, pittiful girl who is randomly crying on a public bus....awesome..thank you Miley.
My dad is all for the Texas thing now. It's weird. But he's my papa bear. I'm not really sure what he's actually feeling. Both of my parents are being weird about it. Like completely supportive and letting me live my life...wait thats what parents are supposed to do?! Weird! All jokes aside, I really am going to miss my family. My brother already wants to fly to Texas to visit me and I'm not even there yet! haha! Family is the best ever...even when they are 1,367 miles away.
I'm Just Sayin'
Thursday, April 7, 2011
My Mouth is Full...
So, I asked my best friend what the title of my blog post should be, and incidentely I did have food in my mouth. She said, your mouth is full. Hence, the painfully unwitty and irrelevent title.
Many of you may be wondering what has been going on in my life since I have not blogged in a month. I realize that I am the worst blogger ever, but you that know me well know that I am horrible at witting letters. I'm kinda flaky at that ( with a few exceptions, and you know who you are (: ). Sooo....get ready for this!!!
The first thing that has changed from last month is that I am now single. It was unexpected, it needed to happen and I am at peace with it. I learned a lot about myself, and grew quite a bit.
The next thing is that I am MOVING!! Yay!!! I got a nanny job in McKinney (really just Dallas) Texas with a WONDERFUL family! The mother is a single working mom with 4 children that she has adopted. They are 7, 10, 11, 12 and the cuttest kiddos ever! She is an amazing woman, and I can't wait to work with her and her children! That's the biggest news! I put my 2 weeks notice in on Monday and packed most of my things up today. Mostly just things that I'm not taking with me, so that my parents can come get it. I am going to miss my parents and all my brothers though. Not to get too mushy, but I try not to think about leaving them behind. Especially my dad. I'm gunna miss him a lot. IDK if he knows, but I miss him most when I go. I love my Mom and brothers too, but I guess I just have a special relationship with my papa. I'm his Mabley, and we've been through alot together.
Anywho! The semester is over in 3 weeks, and then I'm headed out! I'm riding with my bestest friend Brianna "Burton Guster" Shaw! I'm so excited!! I will keep yall's posted.....to the best of my flaky ability :)
Cause lets face it...I'm flakier than frosted flakes!
I'm just sayin'
Many of you may be wondering what has been going on in my life since I have not blogged in a month. I realize that I am the worst blogger ever, but you that know me well know that I am horrible at witting letters. I'm kinda flaky at that ( with a few exceptions, and you know who you are (: ). Sooo....get ready for this!!!
The first thing that has changed from last month is that I am now single. It was unexpected, it needed to happen and I am at peace with it. I learned a lot about myself, and grew quite a bit.
The next thing is that I am MOVING!! Yay!!! I got a nanny job in McKinney (really just Dallas) Texas with a WONDERFUL family! The mother is a single working mom with 4 children that she has adopted. They are 7, 10, 11, 12 and the cuttest kiddos ever! She is an amazing woman, and I can't wait to work with her and her children! That's the biggest news! I put my 2 weeks notice in on Monday and packed most of my things up today. Mostly just things that I'm not taking with me, so that my parents can come get it. I am going to miss my parents and all my brothers though. Not to get too mushy, but I try not to think about leaving them behind. Especially my dad. I'm gunna miss him a lot. IDK if he knows, but I miss him most when I go. I love my Mom and brothers too, but I guess I just have a special relationship with my papa. I'm his Mabley, and we've been through alot together.
Anywho! The semester is over in 3 weeks, and then I'm headed out! I'm riding with my bestest friend Brianna "Burton Guster" Shaw! I'm so excited!! I will keep yall's posted.....to the best of my flaky ability :)
Cause lets face it...I'm flakier than frosted flakes!
I'm just sayin'
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Worst Ever
Alright, so I'm not so hot at the whole blogging everyday thing. It just isn't going to happen. It is HIGHLY unrealistic for me. I don't have time, nor do I have any super cool awesome things to blog about. I'd write about a book I'm reading, but I haven't finished it yet, so writing about it would be complete injustice. However, I will tell you that so far it is AMAZING!! It is Anita Stansfield's new book Shadows of Brierley, and I love it. She is most definitely in the top 3 favorites of my favorite LDS novelists. The others being Josi Kilpack, and a interchangeable space between Dean Hughs and oh dang I would forget his name.... Shoot. If you are reading this, author of Fire of the Covenant and Undaunted, I'm sincerely sorry for not being able to remember your name!
Books have been on my mind lately. Mostly because I have this MASSIVE bookshelf, and 2 or 3 boxes full of books and I haven't had time to read any of them. I know we have established that I am Superwoman, but even she can't do it all right? I haven't even been able to cook very much this semester. I've only baked ONE thing this whole semester! Gross I know. I can't believe it! I made black bottom cupcakes, and forgot to put sugar in them.... WHAT?!?! Who forgets to put sugar in cupcakes? Its like ingredient #2! Seriously. I guess this has turned into more of a complaining post than anything else, but my next one will be happy!! :) This is just motivating me to make more "me time."
Me time is important. It keeps my mental health intact..and that is VERY important.
I'm Just Sayin'
Books have been on my mind lately. Mostly because I have this MASSIVE bookshelf, and 2 or 3 boxes full of books and I haven't had time to read any of them. I know we have established that I am Superwoman, but even she can't do it all right? I haven't even been able to cook very much this semester. I've only baked ONE thing this whole semester! Gross I know. I can't believe it! I made black bottom cupcakes, and forgot to put sugar in them.... WHAT?!?! Who forgets to put sugar in cupcakes? Its like ingredient #2! Seriously. I guess this has turned into more of a complaining post than anything else, but my next one will be happy!! :) This is just motivating me to make more "me time."
Me time is important. It keeps my mental health intact..and that is VERY important.
I'm Just Sayin'
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